You are beautiful.

You. Yes, you. You are beautiful. You are beautiful without any strings attached. You aren’t beautiful despite your flaws. You aren’t beautiful compared to someone else. You are beautiful because you are you. And you being beautiful doesn’t take away from the beauty of anyone else.

There’s a lot of talk of “body positivity” lately. And sadly, its a really one sided conversation. We use the term “all bodies” when we really mean “fat bodies.” And I know what you’re thinking, “Nicole, that’s because skinny bodies already are common in mainstream media.” Nope. There are certain types of skinny bodies in mainstream media. Most often, they are bodies that are skinny but still “feminine” (that is, they have boobs). They can’t be too skinny. They must be toned. And you know what, even those bodies are real bodies! They are bodies that people live in.

When we turn body positivity into a competition, we are just feeding the marketing machine that tells each and every one of us that we aren’t good enough. That our chests are too small, or too big. That our butts are too flat, or too round. That our arms aren’t toned enough, or are “too muscular.” Let’s face it, insecurity is a big way we’re marketed to, and advertisers don’t want to let that go. And when we call thin women “skinny bitches” or tell fat girls “you aren’t healthy” it just reinforces this stupid, meaningless competition.

I’ve written this piece from the perspective of this issue with women’s bodies, because that’s where the conversation is right now. Plus, I’m a woman so it’s the perspective I know. But I want to see the body positivity movement expanded. I want it to encompass bodies of all sizes. I want to see it encompass men’s bodies. I want it to encompass bodies that aren’t gender conforming. Because everyone deserves to feel good in their body.