5 on Friday: Trends Women Hate
Tumblr has a tendency to blow up over things that aren’t really important. Lately, that thing has been “Trends Men Hate.” Basically it’s just a list of things that some guy finds unattractive. Which whatever, people are allowed to find certain things unattractive. Plus, it kind of reminds me of the “fashion don’ts” in Glamour (you know, the ones with the blackout bars on the eyes) which really has me confused why we’re supposed to be upset.
But in the name of fun, we’ve decided to create a list of “trends women hate.” Which may or may not be loosely based on things found in the closets of either my husband or Claire’s fiance.
Oversized T-Shirts
This is another thing guys will quote comfort on. Maybe it’s different for girls, but I’ve had oversized t-shirts, and t-shirts that fit. And they’re both comfortable. Most of these oversized t-shirts also have a logo of some sort on them. It could be a band you like, or a convention you’ve been to, or supporting your fandom. To which I say, they typically make these things in sizes.
Suggested upgrade: Shirts that fit. It’s that simple. If you don’t know if it fits, it probably doesn’t. As for all those oversized shirts you love with logos? Make them into an awesome quilt. Heck, you don’t even need to know how to sew.
Cargo Shorts
Every guy has at least one pair of baggy, shapeless cargo shorts somewhere. To be fair, sometimes they are the kind of thing that does have a time and a place. If you’re out biking, they’re baggy enough to hide bike shorts under. Plus, lots of pockets can be really convenient out on a bike. Hiking is another totally acceptable time to wear them. Or if you’re in a frat, because then it lets us know you’re in a frat.
Suggested upgrade: Flat front twill shorts. Much more flattering, and gives you more of a “put together” appearance.
Jesus Sandals
You know the sandals. They big, bulky, million strap sandals. The sandals your dad wears. They’re so full of straps you may as well be wearing regular shoes. These are another thing that have a totally appropriate place. For example, Keen’s are great for biking because they have that rubber to protect your toes. But most of the time, they’re just silly looking.
Suggested Upgrade: A less strappy version of what you’re wearing now.
Running Shoes as Regular Shoes
I was telling my husband what would be on my list of “trends women hate” (I felt it only fair to warn him). And this was the one that bothered him the most. “They’re engineered to be comfortable, haven’t we evolved enough as a society to wear most comfortable shoes possible?”
Nope. If we had, there wouldn’t be high heels.
Suggested upgrade: A basic pair of fashion sneakers, like a pair of classic Vans. They’ll work with shorts, jeans, and twill pants.
Carpenter Jeans
Are you a carpenter? Are you a between the ages of 2-8 and want to pretend to be a carpenter? Then there is no need to wear carpenter jeans. Well, unless you’re going to build us a bookcase or something, in which case have at it.
Suggested upgrade: A pair of dark, well fitted, straight leg jeans. Get the dark ones, they look dressier and the fading process will take longer.
Do Trends Women Hate Matter?
Nope. Absolutely not. Just like it doesn’t matter what trends men hate. You will still see my husband out in his beloved cargo shorts and running shoes. I will wear the cardigans he despises (really, who hates cardigans?). Sure, if we’re having a date night or going out we try to dress up for the other person. And overall, we try make sure we’re still attractive to each other. But I’ll still think he’s hot in his Jesus sandals, and he’ll think the same when I wear my Converse.
Sweatpants.
At home sweatpants are fine though. That usually means Netflix night. And I freaking love Netflix night.
Cargo shorts are awesome.
Flat front twill shorts make you look like a dork. Probably one wearing boat shoes and a madras shirt.
Bonus: You can carry things. Typically, the things that your significant other, in her pocketless sun-dress, cannot. If you’re rolling solo, you can carry at least 4 beers in cargo pockets.
Sorry, they just make you look bottom heavy.
Another vote here in favor of cargo shorts, on the basis of the practicality of carrying things. My main cargo-shorts related regret is that I don’t have any cargo PANTS, only jeans, and those pockets can get crowded.
Also I’ve realized I’m against straight-leg jeans because I don’t like having the cuffs swish around so much when I walk. I feel like I’m wearing bell bottoms.
One other trend men hate is having one dude claim to speak for all of us. Which I think was your point… 🙂
What kind of jeans do you wear then? I’m thinking straight leg should swish much less.
My point was really more of people are allowed to dislike things, and other people are allowed to ignore them. Heck, if I’m going to keep wearing things my husband doesn’t like what chance does someone on the internet have of changing my mind 🙂
Trend I hate: old nasty baseball caps. They’re gross. I don’t care that you’ve had it from when the Colts won the Super Bowl.
I finally got my husband to wear a pair of Bonobos pants and he’s seen the light. He’s a runner and hardly ever wears running shoes except to run or mow the lawn. His preferred shoes are pair of Toms that look kind of like Vans. If you want a pair of shoes that will feel like sneakers and look professional, Cole Hahn has some pretty cool and comfy options.